So, I decided to do this wellness thing, and then I started thinking about how I'm usually giving myself a bunch of crap for eating X or not doing Y or whatever. I am starting back into doula work, and just thinking about working with new mamas again, has reminded me of all the lovely people that helped me when I was a new mama. One of these people was my postpartum doula. She had a grand suggestion: Rather than make a to-do list, in the weeks following the birth of baby #3 in 3 years, at the end of the day, make a list of all the things you did. Mine would look like this: Nurse baby, stare at baby, change diapers, read stories to toddlers, make breakfast, nurse baby, unload dishwasher, do a load of laundry, nurse baby, eat a snack, change diapers, go for a walk down the driveway and notice all the new daffodils, nurse baby, make lunch, change diapers, change clothes of toddler who didn't make it to the bathroom, dance around the living room, take baby in the shower with me.... you get the idea. It was a long list, and it only took about one day for me to see that I was really getting a ton of stuff done, even though I only felt like I was nursing the baby, which, of course, I was doing a lot. So, right now, instead of focusing on all the crap that I do that may NOT be wellness, I am going to focus on all the wellness things. Like yesterday: I did some doula-related research outside in the sunshine while my toddler played--that falls into wellness. I drank tea and water all day long. I walked the dog. I took my supplements. I practiced gratitude.
Today was one of the last Nia days for the term. It was fabulous as usual. Dancing with those women truly feeds me. We were focusing on body, mind, spirit and emotion, whichever one needed the most focus. I realized that my emotions are all over the place. I'm like Pigpen, except instead of mud or dust or whatever, I am a spazzy ball of emotions, all. the. time. What? That must be fun to live with. Oh, yeah, it's not. What helps? What contributes to wellness? Dancing, breathing, yoga, working out, meditation, drinking water, eating well, enough sleep. Quieting my brain that wants to knowknowknow nownownow. Trees and ferns and moss.
I have also been reading a book by Gay Hendricks called The Big Leap, as suggested by my friend and Nia instructor. Awesome book. One of the things he suggests is moving toward Einstein time, taking responsibility for time in our lives. Never saying, "I don't have enough time, " or other time related excuses or complaints. So, I'm just going to add that in to what I am doing in June and see how it works.